One of my favorite things about Ignatian spirituality is the idea of finding God in all things. This was a relatively new concept when I arrived at BC because, although I grew up in a religious household and had attended Catholic school before, to me God was only in church. God was in the stained-glass, the rock-solid pews, and the tabernacle. I understood God moved about the world, but I never looked for it, and hence I never recognized it.
Through blessings in the forms of classes like Pulse, my CLC groups, Kairos, my spiritual director, and also daily conversations with friends, I’ve come to realize God is indeed in all things. God is in the quiet, in the boring, and in the loud. But I admit I’ve always doubted that God could exist at a party, a bar, a concert, or any setting that is chaotic and wild. But this past semester, I had a huge “God moment” and it changed the way I view God and God’s goodness working in my life.
A few weeks ago, it was a Friday night and I was sitting around in my living room with some of my friends. With COVID-19 and spending so much time together at home, especially on the weekends, it has been draining, and I was feeling pretty tired and grumpy. I was sitting on our couch, in a little puddle of misery, drinking some wine, feeling so angry and burnt out from the pandemic and so tired of all this and questioning why the heck did this have to happen during my senior year.
If you couldn’t tell, the energy was lowwwww. It was a little before midnight, and one of my roommates got a new drink and then went to take the recycling out. When she came back, she took the recycling bin and turned it over, then randomly pulled drum sticks out of a drawer. Next, she flipped that bin over and started banging out an INCREDIBLE beat. Turns out my roommate is very talented at the drums! Next thing you know, we turned our strobe lights on, and we all started jumping and dancing around. We put on Beyoncé’s homecoming tour album (which is incredibly hype, highly recommend) and for the next three hours, we screamed, danced, and serenaded people passing Ruby Hall through our open window. I grabbed a spatula and a mixing spoon and was drumming on the couch, and another roommate was clashing two pot lids together. There was so much joy.
God was there. I felt it loud and clear. In the drumming, the dancing, the singing, and especially in the fact that we didn’t get a noise complaint. With the quick shift of mood from misery to pure bliss, I felt God bringing me alive and reminding me how lucky I am to have my roommates during this pandemic. It reminded me of the importance of making the best of it and having a good attitude. God works in mysterious ways, but if I am in a bad mood and not open to God’s joy, how can I receive it?
While now I have an easier time recognizing God in my everyday life, especially in the loud, it wasn’t this simple “aha!” moment where suddenly I could see God in everything – instead it was much more gradual. Even though I have believed in God my whole life, it takes work and some days it is easier than others to see God moving in the world.
Once I started to notice it, I became more open and more grateful for the love and goodness that exists in my life. It helps me be more optimistic because God and love are everywhere, particularly in small, little ways. God has always been there, I just didn’t see it. You have to look. You have to listen. But God is there, in the midst of everything.
Featured image is courtesy of alfcermed via PixaBay
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